Date: 10 Dec 2011 14:45 Title: Chapter 5
Wow this was probably the best story I've read from your series! Dark, dirty, amoral, dubious, sexy, cleaky, industrial; all good qualities. This was so gripping because it was so dark, and I have a thing for dark stories.
Some story elements were controversial (Limis kissing Rebecca when she was a child, lots of lesbian themes and so forth), but I liked that as well. Having never really read or fully understand the thing about 'augments' this story really nails it for me! Good job! Let's hope the conclusion lives up to the crescendo you've built up in the plot!
Author's Response: On the subject of human augments, that was never covered much outside of Khan and his followers and Bashir's revelation that he was genetically enhanced as a child. I surmise that despite legal prohibitions against genetic engineering humans (though not sure how one could explain the science station in "Unnatural Selection"), Section 31 has created its own armies of augments, but perhaps with Soong's efforts to weed out the more violent tendencies paying off by the 24th century. And needless to say, gay and lesbian romances were never really addressed in the Star Trek canon in the "prime universe", but I've taken that to mean terms like gay, lesbian, or bisexual are rarely ever used in everyday conversation. It's all building towards a big ending and a revelation about Aurellan Markalis that goes where no Star Trek series has gone before, to turn a phrase.
Date: 10 Dec 2011 14:24 Title: Chapter 3
Ho ho! You strayed into some rather controversial topics! Limis kissing a child (legally Rebecca-who I assume is younger than sixteen-is a child). Odd... that's all I can say. I can understand Limis wanted to explore 'experimentation', but I was wondering if Bajoran have qualms like humans do about sex between an adult and a child. I mean where there any other reasons for Limis kissing Rebecca?
I like you getting controversial because I just find that sort of stuff interesting. I'm surprised you got away with publishing that bit of the chapter (Limis kissing Rebecca). But really good and intriguing stuff!
Author's Response: For the record, Rebecca is 16 in these flashback sequences and the romance never became sexual at this point (see my character biographies piece for further clarification). And the canon Trek universe has subtly addressed the topic before with Kirk falling for Rayna Kapec, who was basically a child, or Bashir falling in love with Sarina after she was roused from her cataleptic state (while that episode addressed the inappropriateness of a doctor-patient romance). Overall, this is more a romance between two people from two different worlds.