Date: 30 Sep 2013 07:49 Title: Chapter 2
Short end to the story, and just more piling of the despair. Picard won his coup, sure. He's in command, he has no direct threats for now, and he has an army of superweapons.
But it's interesting, that even as he's dying by Picard's hand, Paris is trying to warn him still. Not just about the Children, but also of rebuilding the Empire. Certainly Picard could have tried without the Children, but even then, what would that accomplish? In Paris's eyes, nothing; from the start of the story to now, he's seemed very much like he was just going through the motions, but had none of the desire or drive to return to the old ways. And, it's like he's pleading with Picard to save himself and lose those old ways before they completely destroy humanity, long before the Klingons and Cardassians get the chance to.
This was a neat little story, and like I said, an awesome addition to the MU lore that exists here on the site. There is so much wiggle room for interpretation of the MU because it is so under-explored in canon, and I love seeing the similarities people have, as well as the very different directions that taken. It'd be neat to see more of this universe later on!
Author's Response: Thank you for that review. I tried to give it a feeling of deep despair. I don't kno wif it worked, but it bums me out to go back and read it, myself, because of the starkness of the story.
Date: 30 Sep 2013 07:42 Title: Going Through the Motions
It's wonderful that, in Ad Astra, there are multiple "universes" within each main genre of Trek, from TOS to VOY and everywhere in between. This is another example of the very creative and awesome takes on very under-explored universe. Once again, another very different place compared to SLWalker and jespah's Mirror Universes, and it was pretty cool to get a new look at this place.
I had always wondered how the Alliance overthrew the Empire, and you give good hints at what has been going on behind the scenes to lead the Enterprise to this moment. You don't give much details into the hows, just the repercussions, which opens the doors to be explored later on but still give enough information to easily know what's going on here.
The characters surprised me slightly, as far as who we were seeing on this, what I'm assuming, antiquated Enterprise. I guess it doesn't matter which Enterprise it is, but the idea of an museum-grade Connie Enterprise still giving Klingon and Cardassian fleets nightmares is a little hard to wrap my head around. Then again, that's probably the beauty of the demon; she's so old, but she's still extremely lethal. Paris and Picard were neat little name-drops, as was the descendant of Reed, and who I'm going to assume was Soong on the freighter with the sleepers. It was neat to see Picard at helm, where he was obviously comfortable in a few episodes of TNG, and it was also neat to see Owen's reaction to Picard sitting in the center chair like he actually DID belong there. A cool comparison to his prime counterpart, who actually did earn the center chair and made quite a name for himself in it.
It's interesting how the augments give Owen and Reed the willies. After all the MU reading I've done the past month, you could almost tie that reaction in to Mac's new "The Moon is Red," where augments take over and establish the Terran Empire; if they were overthrown by "normal" humans, the reaction is perfect. They are NOT going to be happy campers once they grow out of their diapers and start trying to take over again.
And what a heck of a position to find yourself in. Owen is the last, highest ranking officer of the old Empire, and he's presented with a deal with the devil to restore power to his people, but at the cost of being at the mercy of these people who also hate them.
Oh well, looks like it's not his decision to make anymore. Billy was dumb; I wonder if Picard sent him in first as a distraction, and to get him out of the way so that no one would threaten his new position. Owen was right; he really underestimated Picard.
Date: 29 Sep 2013 22:46 Title: Chapter 2
A short bitter chapter two, as Owen try to point out Jean-Luc mistake and what monsters he will unleash and end up no-ones leader.
Shame he didn’t want to listen or realise what fire he has unleashed upon the Alpha Quadrant.
Date: 29 Sep 2013 22:40 Title: Going Through the Motions
So Mistel, even at the end the name ISS Enterprise still haunt the Terran enemies.
Just when they might be some final defiantance the inner weakness of the murder or be murder policy take down the last sane officer.
So the Mirror Picard tricks Billy to do his dirty work and then use his security to take out the marines.
This feels so real and does seem to match the Mirror Universe twisted spasrtian darkness mentality.
Why do I feel the Children of Chrysalis will be what finishes the ISS Enterprise and that Owen/Reed were right and Billy/Picard insanity about restoring the Empire is their end. Still looking forward to chapter two.
Date: 18 Jul 2013 17:16 Title: Chapter 2
Pretty much sums things up that were hinted at but never fully explained in the previous chapter.
Have you considered continuing this? It'd be interesting to see what Picard does next, if he heeds Owen's words, and if not, do the Children of the Chrysalis betray him in the end?
Date: 18 Jul 2013 17:10 Title: Going Through the Motions
Wow! Still reeling from this. Twists and turns galore, but that's what we'd expect in the Mirror 'verse. Nice to see all the familiar faces in an unfamiliar setting. And was that a brief cameo by Leonard McCoy?
Really sad too see things turn out the way they did. By the end of this chapter I was pulling for Paris, but suspected that Picard was up to something.
Date: 11 Jun 2009 19:59 Title: Chapter 2
A short chapter; there's not really a whole lot to it. You may want to consider spacing things out a little more carefully, though there's definitely potential for this to become a good, long-running storyline.
Author's Response: Hell, I'm just glad someone read/reviewed it. I think this could use revision-but there are other tales to tell.....
Date: 29 May 2009 16:33 Title: Going Through the Motions
Damn! That was absolutely cold what happened-and I didn't suspect who was behind it until Paris figured it.
I assume this is the Enterprise C? Or B? Or A? I'd really like to know, as the Empire was never seen again after TOS.