Date: 31 Jul 2014 19:42 Title: Chapter 1
“No, sir...You, sir?” Kira nodded once, and his deep-ocean eyes went wide. “...Holy shit. Sir.”
LOL! After the line before, which was awesome this was one just priceless. Loved it. I put that front and centre because otherwise I would forget to mention it. This story it felt like ... like it were a novel in many ways. It could honestly be expanded out to offer as much but the compact nature of it lends it a certain thrilling accessibility too that's more honest and in a way that's fitting to the relationship of Kira and Odo. For all the issues of trust and questions over the years between their relationship, there is at the core something honest and heartfelt about their expression of feelings after taking so long to admit them.
You convey a sense of the passage of time by filling in some of what happened to Kira in the interim and with the focus firmly on Kira we begin to realise that there's no real mention of others - no Bashir or Dax or O'Brien. Of all people it is Bill we sense she is friends with now in ways. Is she lonely in her new life? It's an impression we gather and in the end she was always going to be lonely because she was not with Odo.
Then we come to Odo's arrival. When he explains the link and how he gave the link his love and memories of Kira you sensed the internal struggle and the age it took to teach them and then how they embraced it and returned that love to Odo. It was a quite wondrous passage.
Kira's railing against Odo was also breathtaking. Achingly painful and beautiful. A really fantastic piece. I'm not one for love stories and definitely not so much for the Odo/Kira pairing post their get together but this one worked because it got to some of those core issues to do with Odo leaving Kira behind and what they would mean all round. So truly, a super job done.
Author's Response: I have breathed the biggest sigh of relief. Everything you said here was exactly what I was trying to get across. The conversation that starts when Odo shows up is my favorite thing I've written so far, and I'm so glad to hear someone else liked it. Thank you, thank you!