Date: 12 Oct 2010 08:22 Title: Chapter Eight
Gul Berat had to make a very difficult choice and it hunts him, doesn't it? Even if it couldn't have been done differently, he still hopes there was another way.
Ewwww, Gruner is more that disgusting, he is... no, there is not a sufficient word in any vocabulary. That description of him stroking his ridges, yuck, it made me shiver!
A vision of Iymender on the floor biting his stylus on the other hand - adorable :) What a shame he and Sorabec won't have a chance to see where their possible friendship would take them. She deserved better than to be shot by that bag of filth.
It definitely haunts Berat, and he wishes it hadn't been like that. His quick improvisation did save lives, at great risk to himself--but it doesn't make him feel much better.
And yes, writing Gruner was just awful. It was even worse when someone decided to interpret that as desirable in some fashion...needless to say, I don't regret chewing that person out. And if you remember that language exercise I sent you...remember when I said you get to decide whether he deserves to have his gender fixed in those sentences. Think we should keep his sentence in the feminine? :evil grin:
I'm glad you liked Iymender, though! He's a very unusual individual, and as a Cardassian I imagine that could be difficult for him without support from the right kind of commander.
Date: 15 Oct 2009 11:38 Title: Chapter Eight
Ah, here is that wonderful description of the bioelectric fields you mentioned. Wonderful! No wonder voles are impossible to get rid of.
Your idea of the hunter array to explain those hideous helmets is brilliant! And I love that Macet was embarrassed by having to wear it in front of Picard. Hehe.
I have nothing more eloquent to say about that furst half. I was totally on the edge of my seat, hungry for more!
Ew... the Gruner guy makes my skin crawl. Excellent writing! Oh, and that hint at Dukat's swaggering flirtation is just epic!
When he shoots Sorabec I just wanna... *grrrr* Lemme at 'im...
The funny thing is, the bit about voles living in high-voltage areas is canon. So when I got the idea about Cardassian sensing bioelectric fields, I had PERFECT justification! :-D
And I'm glad you liked the hunter array idea!
I am VERY glad, though, to hear that you agree what a creep Gruner is. I actually had one reviewer back on the TrekBBS try to tell me that he thought I must be setting up some sort of love interest, even though it was VERY clear that Sorabec wanted no part of his attentions. Kind of that "no means yes" crap that some men still buy into...very sad to see from a Star Trek fan, believe me!
Date: 03 Aug 2009 11:16 Title: Chapter Eight
Even as battle is joined the various characters here reflect on their lives, as one (I imagine) naturally would on the eve of what might be a lethal endeavour. I especially appreciated Spiro's prayer, a simple gesture yet one filled with myriad meanings here.
Thank you so much for reading--and especially for reviewing. :-)
And I'm glad you liked the prayer. A lot of people (at least over at TBBS) seem to think such things have no place in the Trekiverse, but I thought it would be neat to see what belief in the 24th century looks like. Severely diminished, to be sure--but rumors of its death have been greatly exaggerated. ;-)