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Reviewer: FalseBill Signed [Report This]
Date: 18 Jul 2013 23:40 Title: Chapter 1

Very Nice Jespah, adding the the song lyrics, add a bit of flavour and depth to the story.

Do like the Perfectionists as a group to oppose the Temporal Integrity commission. an interesting start to this story.

Author's Response:

Many thanks!

Reviewer: Lil black dog Signed [Report This]
Date: 18 Jul 2013 17:24 Title: Chapter 1

Interesting start.  You've set the stage very well here - dissension in the ranks, and orders to try and fix it, but without using his 'charms' on the young lady.

And who or what is this splinter group?  Sounds like it's gonna play out to be a good, old-fashioned good versus evil scenario.  This could go in so many directions.  It'll be interesting to see where you take it.

Author's Response:

Thank you! And, of course - bad things afoot - bring me Otra!

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