Reviews For First Born
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Reviewer: FalseBill Signed [Report This]
Date: 12 Sep 2013 16:07 Title: Chapter 1

Tut-tut Daniels, that an interest story about how the actions of one temporal agent can do so much damage, I like that Admiral Carmen Calavicci chews him out when she first finds out but later show she understands the human pain of having to watch history suffering.

I felt your alternative impacts and scenarios were very interesting and well thought out, I also feel by making him having to accept the only way to do the right thing was stay away, you gave Rick pain depth.
Jun could at least have a life, but knowing Daniels and your last line sum it up so well he paid a high price for his first-born.

Author's Response:

A high price indeed for a moment's pleasure (the MU actually pays for it ... stay tuned ...). Thank you for reading!



Author's Response:

A high price indeed for a moment's pleasure (the MU actually pays for it ... stay tuned ...). Thank you for reading!

Reviewer: Lil black dog Signed Liked [Report This]
Date: 01 Mar 2012 16:04 Title: Chapter 1

Very nice, jespah.  A temporal paradox reminiscent of 'A Sound of Thunder,' but more easily repaired and without the dark ramifications of the former.  I love your style - the dialogue flowed easily and was very true to life.

Rick's concern - even love - for Jun was perfect and just how we'd expect someone in that position to behave.

Also love the description of the 'shift' - how the lecturer paused, seemed to gather herself, and then began speaking again, telling the same story with a slightly different spin.  Very effective.

All in all, a perfect fit for the challenge. :D



Author's Response:

Reviewer: Mackenzie Calhoun Signed Liked [Report This]
Date: 28 Feb 2012 08:51 Title: Chapter 1

Likey, Jesph. But then time travel and anything time related to do with Trek floats my boat. You weaved it all together as surely as Daniels himself. Great stuff :)

Author's Response:

Reviewer: Ln X Signed Liked [Report This]
Date: 23 Feb 2012 07:18 Title: Chapter 1

Wow that was one weird intriguing plot about temporal mechanics, messing around with the timeline and playing God. I bet it took you some time to tease out the timeline consequences...

Interesting piece.

Author's Response:

Thank you. You should definitely be left with the impression of – they just negotiate around any little problem, no matter what it is, and you can find yourself questioning the present day.

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