Date: 27 Aug 2015 21:15 Title: Star Trek Online: Pathfinder - Dark Horizons
I do have to say, the present tense kind of threw me, particularly as I think everything else was in past.
But it's a damned fine story and I'm curious as to how you'll tie it all up.
Date: 27 Aug 2015 01:27 Title: Star Trek Online: Pathfinder - Dark Horizons
I really liked how the action moved from the all too perfect holodeck creations to the all too imperfect life that Rhys and the others are really leading. And now our two scenes shall meet ....
Date: 24 Aug 2015 21:19 Title: Star Trek Online: Pathfinder - Dark Horizons
The present-tense style is a bit jarring at first (it's been a while since I've last read this after all), but as you are keeping it consistent, you get used to it quickly.
The story is still compelling. It invoked TNG's Genesis which is similarly dark and ominous. Now Im thinking this might instead turn out more like the Walking Dead in Space.
Author's Response: Argh. I'm sorry. I default to that from years and years of forum roleplay where everyone does everything in present tense. I really need to learn to write in a different style for fanfiction. I try to use Free Writes to experiment with new ways. I'm not sure if I should start applying a new style to this or finish it as is and then start using a new style on future projects.
Date: 24 May 2014 20:35 Title: Attention to Detail
Holy crap! Dun-dun-dunnn, indeed! Didn't see that coming at all, but I did wonder if the Undine would somehow try to disrupt the summit or carry out additional terrorists acts - after all, how could they resist with so many of their enemies in one place. This e=bears continuing, pretty please? :)
Date: 24 May 2014 19:50 Title: Attention to Detail
Called it. lol
Awesome story, bud! You did a great job introducing these very recent events in the setting we share to the community, and you had the NPCs perfect too. Be interested in seeing more of your Pathfinder series in the future! Well done!
Date: 24 May 2014 17:32 Title: Attention to Detail
Well played. What kind of a paranoid mood must be permeating the galaxy with these guys on the loose? It calls back to the TNG episode "Conspiracy," only those guys were much more obvious about it what with their worm eating and all that. And those things were much easier to kill.
Date: 24 May 2014 16:40 Title: Attention to Detail
Oh my goodness! The transporter chief, really? And poor Tanaka has no idea. That last line was chilling. Nice job!
I would love to see this expanded, to know what happens at the conference and if the Undine ultimately win, or if the Federation pulls out an ace in the hole.
Date: 24 May 2014 14:33 Title: Attention to Detail
Ooh, chilling. So Pearson is Undine? Or did I misunderstand the implication? You have a great ear for dialogue, which has been true throughout and was again evident here. I really enjoyed this series and Pathfinder will definitely be going on my to read list! :)
Date: 24 May 2014 13:49 Title: Attention to Detail
Oh my GAWD! I loved that. What a terrific ender. What a reveal. I mean, I thought the charming old lady was going to impart some sage advice to Tanaka. Yet all along she's a wolf in sheep's clothing. That's brilliant. Loved it.